musings on the lost, keys, komikon, children's books and k+12

convinced i shall stop, or take a hiatus from writing lengthy quasi-critical takes on seemingly mundane matters. i dont know. found this blog entry too cluttered. wouldn't want to waste anybody's precious time :L read at your own risk.

warning: tl;dr. spontaneous. grammar, spelling nazis, keep out.

i "lost" keys last friday, went to komikon last saturday, read sinister things about k+12 yesterday - a sunday, and thought of my past urge to write a children's storybook today - a monday.

now, these seemingly random things became interconnected today - or, at least, in my imagination, they now make sense as they connect w neon nylon strings, against a dim background, that is, my tinted glasses, which i wear all throughout the weekend, because of the lost keys that caused me to not enter into the house that housed most of my things that i shall tell in detail sooner or later. the tinted glasses does not cause me discomfort, as i could see clearly through it, but people around me may feel a bit weird, thinking me for a lumpen high on something. i am not, fyi. i am not.

kuko ng liwanag. before anything else, let me and the writing and the reading community express condolences to the passing of Edgardo M. Reyes, author of "Sa Mga Kuko ng Liwanag," which was adapted into the film "Maynila Sa Mga Kuko ng Liwanag" by another of the greats, Lino Brocka. here's something from Likhaan (link shared by julien): "Singkulay ng Buhay: Panayam kay Edgardo M. Reyes ni Romulo P. Baquiran, Jr." (may kopyang aktwal pala ako nitong journal!)

news just got in the feed this morning, and lurking further, i came across prof. joey baquiran's comment, mentioning that, according to reyes's child, his father passed away last may 15, and, right after, his family had his remains cremated as the late reyes could have probably requested, maybe, because, as baquiran said, reyes is recluse and does not want attention. i do not want to compare the degree of grief whatsoever, but let me just say that reyes's passing feels heavier than other recent farewells.

lost keys. w this, we really have to accept that we cannot hold onto anything forever. may you rest in peace, dear sir. yes, even mortal idols are lost to death. what more of inanimate things to convince us of security, however temporary? my keys, though needless to say, way more less of value than even animal life, have caused me paranoia, as i went, incomplete, back another home - my parents' house.

at the moment i accepted that i have misplaced my keys, i was cool though i had my bag turned inside out at the front door of the locked house. i was relaxed, murmuring, "ayos lang yan, makikita mo rin yan," as i search through the jungle that is my backpack. i was relaxed. on the outside. i have not succumbed into the push to give in to actual fits of rage, but i am overthinking. what if someone intentionally stole it and happen to locate where i live. what if forces of the state implanted evidence that they may use to file charges against me. what if i come home and find it empty.

with these and other thoughts, i went to may parents' home for the weekend. i shall return to that home come the weekdays, as my housemates would most probably be there. and, there they were. yesterday. confirming my keys are not lost. and what relief after they have located it. i left it in my room.

summer komikon. the paranoia acquired on friday continued feeding on my attention span during komikon. my apologies to people i plagued (plug, not intended) with how i worry about things i have no control of. in general, i did not think that komikon felt okay. maybe, this is just me, not feeling okay during that day, as my mind is clouded with the gloom of grim speculations re: the condition of the house (of stark. kidding. excited to watch the battle of blackwater. but i'll have the wait til the weekend).

here, i share some observations that, i hope, would be taken as mere observations and not accusations or faultfinding or whatever. do feel free to dis/agree or speak your mind, as these are, of course, not conclusive. i'm just thinking out loud that, maybe:

1) komikeros who are most friendly get their stuff sold (uhm, callous comics sold the most--the ideas purported maybe good, but, sorry, i am not really into *see next item*);

2) the visual aspect, of course, is a primary consideration, instead of the narrative. for me, the cover, then the layout, makes me decide whether i want the zine or book enough to purchase it. these days, with the crisis, people like myself have to allocate resources to those deemed to be among the most worth the spending (but, i think it is worth mentioning that ser omeng estanislao is kinda all of the above: friendly as we enjoyed our brief conversation w him, and needless to say, has an eye for visuals in any dimension, and an entertaining narrative. kahit lutang ako, at wala sa huwisyo humanting at bumili ng komix, kumuha akong "bruno barbero" niya. gusto ko rin sana ng "lipad." narealize ko ngayong ilan pa sa sana nabili ko e maktan ni tepai pascual, mga komix ni macoy, mga teks ni chaps ng SSM, at malamang, hindi ko na maalala ang iba*.);

3) komix rock stars, are, really, rockstars in another, er, discipline or field of interest (bukod kay doc ng callous comics, hello, siyempre, ang kikomachine ni manix abrera. ang pila ng magpapaotograp sa kanya ang nagpapasikip ng mga venue ng mga komikon. rakenrol! btw, sa after komikon tambay-talk ng ilang qbccc peeps at ilang pantas peeps, parang, oo nga no, dapat maging rakstar muna bago magkomix. tulad nga halimbawa ni tom morello [orchid], among many others na inenumerate nina josel, aj, noel.);

4) the komix community, is, well, a community that has been flourishing, but maybe, there is a need for criticism (may ganito nang sinimulan si adam david, nasa poc.net ata noon. pero, in general, mukhang may problema sa kritisismo dahil feeling parati ng mga pinupuna, personal ang mga puna sa kanila bilang nilalang. naalala ko ang essay ni katrina stuart-santiago sa rogue. anyway, balik sa komix peeps, sana, mawala yung "artists tayo, let's just do what we want and support each other" na thinking. nothing wrong with it, pero sana may pagpapaunlad. ang suggestion ng komix criticism is not really to suppress, pero, to encourage standards? i mean, take this as a challenge, maybe, as our education system is flawed bigtime, maybe, komix can, in however little a way, be a venue for alternative learning? unless, komix peeps don't give a flying fvck about education because *see next item*);

and 5) despite initially being a media for the basic masses who are deprived of formal education, thus, making them illiterate, making the visuals as aid necessary for comprehension, it is quite ironic that it appears like the ivory tower of indie komix is higher than that of indie cinema. why? i guess because of production, of how indie komix is created. as carlo cielo have said in our conversation (this is not verbatim as i am extracting from memory the essence of those exchanges), komix can be created apart, away from society, unlike indie films, where you have to shoot in a specific location. filmmakers experience social reality along the way, and, reality bites them in the course of production. komix creators may opt to stay in their comfort zones. but, don't get me wrong. there's the issue of exploiting the poor through poverty porn in indie films, and there are mercenaries in the komix community, as well.

there. i hope i have someway somehow contributed some thoughts to ponder on, re: the previous and the upcoming komikons. hope no one kills me for these thoughts. just trying to help, so the komix community would be taken seriously by society. (though, maybe, that's unlikely for this lifetime as no matter how mature the comics you read are, no matter how complex tha animated fils you watch are, they are taken as something appreciated by kids, if not teenagers. well, at least, most of the "adults" i know. anyway, ) now, for another k--

conclusion: kupal+12, children's books. honestly, this is one issue that kinda confuses me, but a recent post on the feed clarified what the stand on this issue shall be: in the feed is an image of a document stating that the a.p. (araling panlipunan or social studies) curriculum under the k+12 is based on the theme formed by the national council for social studies of the united states. does that mean that the education our generation has been blessed with, thank god, is not colonial enough? the state university is initially meant to produce technocrats to preserve neocolonial rule after the so-called philippine independence. so, is the k+12 an intensification of the colonial education? which shall be more accessible to the masses for easier mind control--remember that the constitution guarantees free education for the primary and secondary levels? without the k+12, children are taught how great the presidents of this country and their imperialist bosses.

thus, after k+12, the high school graduates shall be slaves willing to serve their colonial masters. so, we shall then push through independent zine publishing with children** as target readers, shall be encouraged. to counter the brainwashing of the state with our brainwashing. kidding aside, fvck k+12. besides not having the materials to implement it, it is not even ideal at all, i guess. at first, it was difficult to pass judgment on the program. but then, the argument is simple: no matter how good the fvck the program is, it seems like we are not ready for it. high school teachers are expected to be resourceful to implement the k+12. the government must be fvcking kidding. in this case, however, the program is far from good, as it seems to give birth to aldous huxley's brave new world--where brute military force is not needed, with conditioning and, of course, information control.

apologies, i really ended this post prematurely. tired of typing :| just needed to let things out. kbye. leaving you with "tales for little rebels : radical politics in famous children's books" from brainpickings and something from quebec *o, rather, ayoko na alalahanin dahil may nakita si karize na comics adaptation ng "do androids dream of electric sheep" ni philip k. dick. kaso, may force of evil na unang nakaiskor nito at wala nang ibang kopya. **i don't know, after maurice sendak's death, i have this urge to write something for the children. may piyesa na akong gagawan ng dibuho, hindi ko pa lamang nga naiskedyul nang maayos. tas, yung subconscious urge, ayun, naging conscious o nabigyang dahilan kuno dahil sa k+12.

[got the image from the page of international student movement. i'd like to repeat the idea of what i've posted about this: polytechnic university of the philippines students pay the lowest tuition in our country because they dare burn chairs to fight for their rights. with the demography of university of the philippines students, such radical stance seems unlikely. i hope the call to rollback the tuition fee be intensified again.]